More Katrina-related Foul-upsThe world has gone mad. Did you know that, in the calamity of Hurricane Katrina, the US military has lost 36 armed attack dolphins? Did you even know there were such things as ARMED ATTACK DOLPHINS?? They are trained to shoot their toxic dart guns, which are attached to special harnesses.
Anyone who has watched the first two minutes of
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" will remember the claim that dolphins are the second most intelligent species on Earth (first are alien rats) and have decided to leave the planet. Someone please rent it for the army.
SourceThis is Henry sitting in for Chenster.
I have been selling a lot of stuff on eBay lately. All this pack and ship has reminded me to recommend you a great way to waste a few minutes. Especially if you're obsessive-compulsive. Here.
-Henry, taking over the Chenster blog (until he wakes up and deletes all my posts).
YOUR PENIS IS A THERMOMETER (quote, unquote), claims “Best Life” magazine. Their slogan is
what matters to men and I say I can’t agree more. Anyways, they apparently did a poll that links erection problems to major illnesses. Guys: faced with Why are you putting
it there!? you can cite the publication (practically a journal) and explain you’re just trying to get an accurate reading of her.
Gals: The article also reads “’The penis...is the thermometer of men’s health,’ says Ridwan Shalbsigh, M.D., an associate professor of urology at Columbia University.” That’ll make him think twice.
“Best Life” October/November 2005, pg. 28
My name is Henry W.
Dear Readers:
While Chenster is, I'm sure, soundly asleep on what he believes to be an innocent Sunday morning, I have decided to make my surprise attack. haha. This is executed wholely in a drunken stupor and partly in response to his censorship of my past
labor. As I doubt he will read his own blog often, I recommend you not tell him why you snicker so.
Warning: these posts are only suitable for the irreverent. Sorry for the late warning.
My name is Henry.
Since I did not write any blog for this entire week, I think I should recap what I experienced in this past week…
First, an announcement (some of you already know this):
$4 Cocktails @ 125 Bars All Next Week - RSVP For Pass
http://www.toasttonewyork.com/bars.asp?rf=E3
Chenster’s Week (9/19 – 9/22)
Monday:
I went to the Saints vs Giants football game on Monday Night with Marc, Joe, Chris Blackhall, and Ben Lerner. Below chronicles the night:
5:30pm – exited NY1 Plaza
5:35pm – entered Korean deli; purchased three bottles of tonic water and three bottles of Coke
5:45pm – entered Ben Lerner’s apartment; mixed gin with the tonic water and coke we just brought
5:55pm – got on subway heading to Port Authority Bus Terminal; Joe, Chris, and Ben started to work on the beverages we just mixed
6:15pm – arrived at Bus Terminal; ran into Marc Taubman; while waiting for the bus, Joe purchased beers for himself and Marc; both men started drinking on the street; a police officer spotted them and ordered the two men to discard the beers; they went into Port Authority and finished the beers anyway
7:15pm – got on a bus heading to Giants Stadium; Joe, Ben, and Chris continued drinking on the 45 min bus ride
8:00pm – arrived at Giants Stadium; Marc and I were the only sober members of the group; all of the beverages we have mixed have been finished by now
8:15pm – inside the stadium, we went on line to purchase more beers as Joe, Ben, and Chris each purchased multiple bottles
9:15pm – half time; Joe, Ben, and Chris went on line to purchase more beers, again, multiple bottles for each
11:00pm – mid fourth quarter; crowd started to head for the parking lot as the Giants had the game in hand
11:30pm – we got on a bus full of passengers, no more seats, standing only; Chris started to sing, Ben joined; some passengers on the bus actually liked their singing; but most were shocked to see heavily drunk men singing at below karaoke level
12:15pm – backed to Port Authority Bus Terminal; Chris and Ben wondered around the bus terminals while still singing with lyrics such as “I am totally wasted, yeah, I am so wasted!”
On my way back home, I realized why people like to go to football games…
Tuesday and Wednesday
Joe and I went to a two-day class (16 credits!) called “InterActive Influence” in midtown. The class was great, as we learned how to listen, start a mutual conversation, network, and use techniques to influence decision making at work place…
I missed the premier episode of Martha Stewart’s Apprentice.
Thursday
Did anybody saw ABC’s Primetime last night? The program had actors perform scenarios such as domestic violence, child abuse, and shop lifting in public, and had hidden cameras capturing the bystanders’ reactions. Most people did not help…
For those that helped and intervened, women outnumbered men. Does this mean women have more empathy than men do? However, when the domestic violence scenario was a woman hitting a man, no one intervened. When asked why, the bystanders said they assumed that the man been hit have cheated, thus deserve the punishment…how interesting…
Friday
Everyone, have a great weekend! Hope no major tragedy will be caused by Hurricane Rita…and our federal government…
My friend Henry is writing the blog for today, please see his two posts below...Take a Hike
Last night I rented the uber-witty "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" and was surprised by the subtle messages imbued in the eye candy adventure. It features an alien race of greasy, fat, bureaucratic slobs that blew up the insignificant planet Earth to clear the path for their hyperspace travel. Could this be a faintly disguised attempt to criticize Bush's America and Afghanistan (via Michael Moore's assertion that we--yes WE-- bombed the country to clear a path for oil lines)? Read: oil = travel.
Of course not. After all, Douglas Adams released the story on BBC Radio in 1978. Even with subtexts and parallels aside, it was a highly enjoyable movie that I very much recommend for the entire house.
http://www.hitchhikersmovie.com/
Hurricane evacuation of elderly turns deadly
What the fu*k is wrong with our country? Can't we do anything right anymore? This morning's breaking news involves the death of 20+ elderly evacuees on a bus headed away from Hurricane Rita to avoid the ill fate of those senior citizens who were left to die during Hurricane Katrina. The only news of relief is that some managed to escape the exploding bus. As of the time of writing, the cause of the fire leading to the explosion has not been confirmed, but it is speculated to be due to the bus's braking system leading to oxygen canisters exploding (as reported by CNN).
We're keeping an eye on this, but this much is clear: those responsible for hurricane evacuation need to get their act together.
